How to boost your self confidence
I'm Lucy Whitemore and this is my story!
Back around 8 years ago I got a new job which was very stressful. Due to the stresses of the job I ended up getting glandular fever and started suffering with depression and anxiety. For years I did nothing about it, and I just expected to feel like that for the rest of my life. I had also always suffered with really low self confidence in my body and in myself just in general. At my job, even though I was doing well, every tiny little mistake that I had made was picked up on and that then started to knock my self confidence even more!
Last year my husband left me and one of the main reasons being my depression and anxiety had just gotten so out of control, I had come off my antidepressant at the start of the year and didn't want to go back on them.
When my husband left me that was my final straw and I knew I had to sort myself out if I wanted to be truly happy in myself.
So I started to work on myself and I have now really started to find my true self!
It is so important to know yourself and love yourself to be able to fully commit and have any great relationships whether it be romantically or with friends.
Here are the following tips that I have used to boost my self confidence and to help me start to love myself:
- self care -
Self care is doing more of the things that you love and that make you feel great! It can be having a bubble bath, going on a run, learning a new language, reading or any type of hobby. When I first started looking after myself I aimed to do 3 self care things a day. This gives you time to focus on yourself and your needs.
- pay attention to how you are speaking to yourself -
I never used to speak to myself with kindness, I was always saying something horrible, whether it be you're fat, you're ugly, you're not good enough, everyone would be better off without you. When you are feeling depressed and anxious it can be very easy to speak to yourself like this. If you pay attention to how you are speaking to yourself, as soon as you say something horrible to yourself, you should flip would you have said, to the complete opposite, for example - if you say to yourself 'I'm not good enough' flip it and say 'I am good enough'. The more you do this, the less frequent the horrible thoughts will come to you.
- daily gratitude -
Nowadays, a lot of people can find it hard to appreciate the little things in life. But it's once you start to appreciate the little things in life that you truly appreciate everything. Everyday I say in the morning and evening what I am grateful for that day. It can be anything from your legs for taking you on a walk, to your friend that you spoke to, to your car for getting you to a certain destination.
- daily affirmations -
Affirmations are used to help challenge your negative thoughts and they can be used for anything. When I first started looking after myself I would do daily affirmations for my body. I would stand in the mirror every morning and every evening and say the following - I love the skin that I am in, my body can do awesome things, my body is beautiful, I am perfect and complete just the way that I am. If you keep saying this to yourself every day, it will slowly start to ingrain into your subconscious mind and you will start to believe it yourself.
- create a self love list/self love jar and look back at this when you are feeling not so great in yourself -
For this, you need to write down all of the things that you love about yourself, this can be your body but also your personality traits, I found this extremely hard to do initially, so if you are struggling with this, speak to your friends and family and ask them what they love about you and write it down!
Written by Lucy Whitmore
Give these tips a go, and keep up with them. You will start to see some changes in the way that you feel about yourself and your body. If you have been talking to yourself negatively for years, it can take some time to start to learn to love yourself but you can most definitely do it! I have every faith in you, and you should have every faith in yourself... You've got this!